Who knew when I decided to create a spring series focusing on stress management that there would be a pandemic and all of our stress levels would shoot through the roof? Not me.
2020 is giving us a run for our money, and now it’s more important than ever to learn how to manage our stress so it doesn’t permanently move into our lives.
What I’ve been hearing about most from people over the past two weeks is the stress of managing uncertainty.
There is an understanding that most things in our lives are uncertain, but moving through our general fast-paced days pre-pandemic, we could forget that fact. But now uncertainty is screaming at us. And with this much uncertainty, stress is never very far behind.
When will this be over?
When can I go back to work?
What if I get sick or someone I know gets sick?
Will this happen again?
When can I see my friends?
These are all good questions, and not having the answers right now gives stress a good chance of taking over our lives. So how do you manage stress when feeling bogged down by uncertainty?
Here’s one tried and true strategy I live by (I’ve been using it for the past two weeks) and want to share with you:
Break tasks into slivers, not chunks.
Breaking any task that causes stress into smaller pieces causes a big picture idea—which can feel overwhelming—to get slivered out into several small and more manageable bits, creating steps toward the bigger goal. This strategy allows us to see a way through to the end. That’s why it’s one of my favorites. Seeing slivers gives a starting point. Chunks can create panic.
For example, looking at our current situation as a chunk can get overwhelming very quickly. Then the questions I listed above have room to grow in our minds. We don’t know the answers, and that alone can cause stress. So I suggest slivering this situation out to make the unknown less daunting.
An example of a sliver would be “I got through yesterday and today is going OK so far.” That is honestly as far as any of us can go with being certain about anything, and saying a statement like that to ourselves can help us get into the present, to focus on what we are doing in the moment instead of looking into the uncertain future.
Another way to manage the challenges we're all facing is to introduce elements into your daily routine that you look forward to. This could be a work-related task, a catch-up call with friends, or tackling household chores that you've been postponing. Additionally, if you're dealing with mental health issues and seeking to make them more manageable, consider exploring your support options. This might involve finding a therapist, joining a support group, or seeking more intensive treatment. For instance, if you are struggling with alcohol use, recovery services like alcohol rehab near me play a crucial role. Such support can help you establish a structured schedule and routine that you can depend on throughout the day, providing a framework that supports your recovery journey.
Creating some structure or focusing on something that will make you feel good or you know you have to do (you might dislike laundry, but clean sheets can feel nice!) helps break down the unknown into some certainty: “I know what’s coming today; I’m going to do laundry.”
Staying mindful and focused on slivers reduces stress and helps us take it one step at a time, one day at a time. That’s why I always say: Slivers, not chunks.
I encourage you to practice breaking your day into slivers. See if that helps improve your focus and decrease any stress you are feeling through this uncertainty.
If you are interested in learning more about managing your stress, I also encourage you to check out my online store, where I offer tons of skills to manage all types of stress.
Emotional Spring Cleaning
When you think of spring, you often think of shedding the old and bringing in the new. But that doesn’t have to mean just throwing out those old sweaters to make room for new ones. You can apply the same idea to the emotional clutter you collect and hold on to.
Just like unused clothes in a closet, emotions can take up room you can’t spare in your brain. That’s because you unintentionally hoard emotions like guilt, shame, sadness, and anxiety.
But what purpose does this collection of unfortunate emotions serve? None!
It's time to clean out that closet, weed that garden, take out the trash … you get the idea. It might not be as easy to throw out emotional clutter as it is to donate that ratty old sweater, but it can be done with a little patience and kindness.
Below are three steps to guide you through your emotional spring cleaning.
1. Emotional Sorting
Take those emotions off your mental shelf and look at them one by one. Do you need this emotion right now? Do you enjoy wearing it? If not, toss it into the trash. If you want to hold on to it, ask yourself why you want to keep it and for how long. I find these questions can help separate us from our thoughts and emotions, and help us answer honestly.
If you need some distance, I encourage you to ask these questions out loud. Talking it out can help! When you decide which thoughts and emotions are taking up too much space, you can take the next step in letting them go.
2. Journal
Put those thoughts from the trash pile onto a page. No judgment, no editing (swear words included), no holding back. Writing these thoughts down helps free your mind of any ruminative thinking. After you finish writing it all down, you can choose to keep it, shred it, or throw it out. Throwing out the physical evidence of those emotions can be particularly cathartic for many people.
3. Make a Self-Care List
Practice being kind to yourself. To loosen the grip of negative thoughts and emotions, and fully let go, you also need to put good things into your life. Go to the movies, read a book for fun, go for a walk, or do something you love on your own or with a friend. Make a list of activities that make you happy and pick something from it at least once a week.
Remember that these steps may need to be repeated several times before you feel the full effect of
letting go. Do not give up!
It is hard cleaning out old stuff, even when you desperately want to kick it to the curb. This is especially true of emotions. Be patient with yourself. You can always spend some extra time on Step 3 if you feel stuck.
Sending good energy your way!